An excerpt from AE Brain
"Yes, I partook fully of male privilege. I wasn't talked over at meetings; it was assumed I knew what I was doing unless proven otherwise; and there are a thousand and one little things, some of which I'd observed with incredulity and disgust at the way other women were treated, but most of which I was completely unaware of. As unaware as a fish is of water. "
How much does that happen? It's hard for me to tell because I generally assume that a person is competent at what they do. ..or at least I think I assume that. Do I subconsciously discount a woman's opinion just because she's female; if so, how would I recognize that's what I'm doing? I know that it does happen--I have a female friend who knows more about cars than I do, but she tells me that mechanics often don't take her seriously--but do the people who do that realize they're doing it?
Thursday, December 4, 2008
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2 comments:
There are inbuilt attitudes of chauvanism and racism that are sometimes quite surprising since they fly in the face of rational thought.
I usually start by assuming competence and allow the person (of either gender) to prove me wrong.
I've been lucky, as I was raised in a house with a professional, working mother. She had 4 university degrees and has done more with her life than I ever will. And many of my female friends in university or subsequently in the work world were very capable. So I don't think I discount female input, with one possible exception.
That exception is when it comes to what men are thinking. Plenty of times I've had women indicate what they thought a man was thinking (sometimes me) and it rarely is accurate. I think they tend to over-analyze male behaviour. Half the time they wonder about hidden motivations or messages that just aren't there. Guys tend to be thoughtless and instinctive in many cases or just aren't having deep thoughts (or are thinking earthy thoughts) - not many machinations there. In this one respect, I usually am skeptical of female input, just as I am when I hear men speculating on female motivations and actions (usually also poorly informed and inaccurate).
I too have heard females try to tease out all the implications and underlying meanings of a male's actions. I've had to reassure several of them that, for instance, "I'm not hungry" doesn't mean "You're a lousy cook and I'm in love with some other girl and I'm probably moving out tomorrow." There's a little hyperbole there, but only a little.
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